Hentai!
by someloser
Summary: Naruto and Sasuke read come come paradise? Wha? there is something wrong in that book! What would it be? (I've changed the rating, sorry for any trouble that migth have caused)


Disclaimer: No... I don't own Naruto... snif...  
  
Ok!!! This is my first fic, so don't get your hopes too high, it's just a silly idea I had, and tried to make a fun-fic out of it. And about the pairings I wanted to say none, but I think there is some hints, anyway, if you want to read a real romance try other fic. Ah, and for those who likes to know when the fic takes place, it's after the return of Tsunade to Konoha, and... ah pretend that Sasuke didn't join the sound ok? Please??  
  
HENTAI!!  
  
Today was a good day in Konoha! Yes a new Hokage arrived, Tsunade- sama, and in her charge the the future for the hidden leaf was bright and glorius. So everybody worked hard and happy, to build a new era!  
  
"Shut up dobe!"  
  
Well not everybody...  
  
"Make me!!"  
  
"Guys... please give it a rest, its been like this all day..."  
  
Meet team 7, Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto and Haruno Sakura, and their sensei, Hakate Kakashi.  
  
"Sakura is right, stop this yelling, I can't read like this"  
  
The both boys "humphed" to their sides, and walked towards the village, Sakura silently thanked her sensei and folowed the boys. Kakashi just gave a long sigh and began to walk as well.  
"Ok team, todays training was very good, but it would be even better if we had instead of competetion, team work" Kakashi said looking at Naruto and Sasuke, "We are a team remember, the power of one is the power of all, so there is no need to prove who's stronger, alrigth?"  
Naruto just made a bored face and thougth 'Dahhhh Kakashi-sensei, of course there is a need, if I prove that I'm stronger than the Uchiha bastard, then every one would have to see that he just have pose, and then Sakura-chan would go out with me , and then....'.  
Sasuke, on the other hand, is thinking 'The power of one is the power of all huh? Yeah, so I should stay here and be a weak idiot like this dobe, and never get my revenge! I don't think so!'  
'Kakashi-sensei you shouldn't make a serius lecture holding a pervert book' Sakura analized with a sweatdrop.  
"... and that is all for today,see you guys tomorrow, same place, same time" said Kakashi, while making a hand seal and disapearing in a puff of smoke. 'Yeah rigth, same hour... puff I realy need a bath, I'm all sweat' thougth the green eyed kunoichi, "Bye Naruto, Bye Sasuke-kun! See you tomowrow!" she waved and went home.  
"Bye Sakura-chan!!!!" Naruto waved back, "See, she said my name first"grinned the the fox ninja, "pffft, big deal idiot.".  
With that said, Sasuke was about to leave, when he heard the voice of his teamate "Hey Sasuke, check this out!!" he turned to see what the hell the dobe wanted, and there he was, holding Kakashi's book, come come paradise.  
"Hehe, he must have droped this when he was making that hand seal, now we are going to see what is this book all about, I bet it's very dirty, hehehe" and so he began to read.  
"We!? Humph, don't includ me in , I've got better things to do" Sasuke said and once againd started leaving. "Owww poor little Sasuke, what is the problem? Mommy dosen't let you read this kind of things?" Naruto provoked, and it worked!  
"Give me this dobe, I'll read it and show to you that it is just a stupid book." Said that, Sasuke grabed the infamous book, and began reading, along with Naruto.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------- A few pages later ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------  
  
The boy's eyes were glued to the book, even if some of the words they didn't understand (and I'm not saying those words ), but something was strange, and Sasuke was the first one to realise it.  
"Hey Naruto, don't you think there is something odd here, look at the description of the characters" pointed Sasuke, "Now that you said it, this naugthy red eyed women here looks like that sensei, whats is her name... ah Kurenai!!"Naruto said, "And it's not only her, there are others descriptions that looks like some of the women of Konoha" Sasuke completed.  
"Yeah, but I wonder who is the pink-haired girl with emerald green eyes and have a birth mark on her hips, I don't think I've seen her before..." wondered Naruto with a hand on his chin. "Huh? Here did you read it?" asked Sasuke, "Oh, it was here" pointed the loud ninja, and it was written:  
  
And so she looked like a mermaid, with shiny emerald eyes and unique pink hair, a true beauty! So, not being able to resist anymore, he took her small, nude body in his arms and began to kiss her, starting rigth at her cute birthmark on her hips.  
  
"Naruto!! Don't you see dobe, this girl is Sakura!" the Uchiha avenger roared, "What!!? No way, not Sakura-chan!" Naruto roared back, "Think for second idiot, how many girls with green eyes and pink hair do you know ?".  
The blond ninja put his hand on his chin again and started brainstorming, a minute later he yelled "DAMM PERV SENIN!!!!! I'm gonna kill him!!!", said that, Naruto was ready to deliver a 1000 years of pain to a well know Senin.  
"What are you going to do dobe?" Sasuke asked, "Isn't it obvious? I'm going to beat the author of this crap to a pulp, and then I'll be Sakura- chan's hero, then she'll go to a date with me, then..."and Naruto was off to his dream land.  
But Naruto words had a different effect on the Young Uchiha. Being "Sakura-chan's hero" brougth a bad memory for Sasuke, when he had to admit to Sakura that it wasn't him who saved her fron the grip of Gaara's sand, it was Naruto, and the way she smiled at him while the blond idiot tried to perform the chidori, it just pissed him off!. "Hum, aa, Wait Naruto!" said a now embarresed Sasuke, "I'm going with you!".  
Naruto, who was just about to hunt down the ero senin, turned to Sasuke and looked at him in the same way he would if the Uchiha had grow a second head, "Why? This is 'none of my business' and don't you have 'more important stuff to do' " mocked Naruto.  
"Well, hum, it's not like that! That senin you are talking about, he is the same guy who butted in my figth against Itachi rigth?"asked Sasuke, "Yeah." replied Naruto, "and he's strong rigth?" "Yeah.".  
Sasuke gave a relif sigh, he foud a great excuse. "So, if he is strong, I should figth him! I don't care about Sakura."  
Now the fox ninja is confused, but he just shurged "Ok, come with me, and try to not slow me down.". "Dobe that's my line...".  
And so our "heros" went to punish the evil ero senin.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------- Now we go with Sakura ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------  
  
"Ah home at last!" exclamed a very exausted Sakura, but she wasn't tired just because of the training, the real reason was the constant figth between Sasuke and Naruto, and it's not those silly things from before, they are real rivals now, 'and Sasuke-kun realy is obsessed with this superior complex of his' Sakura thougth remembering what Kakashi said in that day, when the two boys almost killed each other.  
The pink haired Kunoichi made her way to the bath room, eagering for a nice, hot and long bath, but instead she fond a note:  
  
Dear Sakura The bathtub's pipes are broken, here is some money to the puplic baths.  
  
Love, Mom.  
  
Inner Sakura screamed with rage, just like a wild animal, after calming down, she went to her room, picked a clean set of clothes, shampoo, and other girly things (I don't know, go figure yourself).  
Sakura made a sprint to the baths, getting there in no time, and now, for real, she was enjoing a nice bath! "Ahhh heaven..." sighed Sakura, in bliss, sinking even more in the water, and suddenly a voice called her:  
"hey, aren't you Kakashi's girl... Sakura rigth?"  
Sakura turned to see Anko, the "Naruto-like" jounin as Sakura called her in the chuunin exam , "Oh yes it's me Anko-san, how are you?" she polited asked. "Same old girl, freaky ninjas, suicide missions, gambling with hokage-sama. And how about you? Is Kakashi still that lousy teacher?" grinned the jounin.  
Sakura gave a smal giggle "Yes, and always reading that nasty book of his". "Ah could you do me a favor , can you wash my back, damn, I can't even move my arms today, I must be getting old..." then she turned her back to the girl.  
The young kunoichi gave a nod, and when she was ready to scrub her back she noticed a seal, but not just some seal, it was the same curse seal that Sasuke had.  
"Uh, Anko-san, this in your back..." Sakura said somewhat nervously, the older women just said "The Uchiha boy has one of these too rigth?", "Yeah" Whimpered Sakura.  
"Ha, don't worry girl, that kid is strong, now how about that scrub?"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------- Back to the angsty avenger and the hyper hokage-wannabe ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------  
  
"And that's my most powerful jutsu!!!!'' Naruto said with a 'ta- da!' pose.  
"That's your secret wepon? use henge-no-jutsu to be a naked girl!!?" asked a realy angry, and blushing, Sasuke, "Hot naked girl." Corrected Naruto "And I'll alow you to copy my sexy no justu with your sharigan, you should be grateful".  
"Naruto, there is no way I'm going to do that." Sasuke stated, "Fine, so do you have a better idea? that Jiraya migth be a pervert, but he is damn strong. Plus he was the one who taught me the rasegan and the summon no jutsu!" said Naruto, getting stressed by Sasuke's whining.  
Both of them stoped for a minute 'I hate to say this, but Naruto has a point, and that Senin already saw my chidori' thougth Sasuke and then a idea came to him, it didn't pleasure him, but what the heck!  
"Say Naruto, how about Kakashi's team work?", the fox boy just grinned  
  
After a moment, the two boys were hiding in the bushes, near the wooden walls of the women's public bath, and of course,near the wall was the famous peeping tom, Jiraya!  
"Ok! Are you ready Sasuke-chan?" whispered Naruto, "let's do it dobe." answered Sasuke.  
"OI! Pervy Senin!!!!!!!" Yelled Naruto, "Shiiiiiiiiiii!! Damn it Naruto, don't you see I'm in a middle of a resarch here?" said the annoyed Jiraya, "what you guys want?" continued Jiraya, now looking at Sasuke.  
"We came here to teach you a lesson! How dare you put Sakura-chan in your disgusting book!!" said Naruto taking a combat stance, "Sakura-chan?" the old Senin asked, but right away he remembered "Ah, the big foreheaded girl, yeah, I think used her in some history... But why are you guys so mad about that, is she your girlfriend Naruto?"  
"Wha, no she is not..." said Naruto, now blushing, "Then she is your girlfriend rigth?" said Jiraya pointing to Sasuke, "NO! I don't have a girlfriend, I'm here just to fight, I don't care about Sakura..." and now Sasuke is blushing as well.  
"Grrrrr! enough talk, time to kick your ass!" roared Naruto, while jumping into the figth, and in a flash five Naruto shadow clones surronded Jiraya, punching and kicking Jiraya in a high speed and finaly kicking him into the air, "Naruto-rendan!" Naruto yelled, and on the air sasuke was already delivering a seguence of kicks "Shishi-rendan!", making the poor Jiraya hit hard on the floor.  
"Did we get him" asked Sasuke, landing next to Naruto, "I don't know, it was too easy, maybe he's too old hehehe" the now cocky blond ninja laughed.  
"Yeah, he must realy suck to be beaten by sissy boys like you." said familiar voice behind the duo, yes it was Jiraya, and the one that suffered the attacks was just a Shadow clone, and before they could be even suprised, the powerfull senin just tapped on their backs, sending the two boys flying across the fragile wall of the baths, making a big splash sound.  
  
Naruto was feeling dizzy 'man what the hell happened, and what are those soft things' wondered Naruto by grabing the "soft things" (yeah I know that's a clichê...), and suddenly he blacked out.  
"Gasp! Cof cof! Damn it, how could I not have seen that it was a bushin!?" Sasuke cursed while trying to stand and go back to the figth, but a soft voice caught his attention, "Sasuke-kun?".  
Sasuke turned to see who was calling him, and froze! Sakura was just before him naked! It was the first time he ever seen a girl like that (sexy no jutsu doesn't count), and even if he acted all cold, he still was a boy. And now he could only think this 'She realy does have that birthmark!'.  
Of couse, that just took a second, when Sakura realised that she was naked rigth before a boy, she cried and sank in the water covering herself with a towel. "Ahhh, I'm, I'm sorry!" Sasuke covered his eyes and nose, and ran towards the hole in the wooden wall made by Naruto and himself, but he bumped into someone on the way.  
"First the hokage-wannabe and now the Uchiha brat, what the hell is wrong with the kids nowdays", Sasuke loked up to see that it was Anko talking, and holding a nocked-out Naruto by his collar.  
Then, suddenly in a pile of smoke, Kakashi appeared, and eyed Naruto's pocket, to be more precise his beloved book, and hugged it like the world was about to end. Yes, he was too focused in come come paradise to realize the situation, but when he looked at Sasuke holding his nose, Naruto unconseious, and a group of female ninjas ,wearing only towels surronding, them, he knew something was wrong!  
"Ops"  
"Get them!!!!!!!" Yelled a random kunoichi.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------- Dream land ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------  
  
Sasuke was in a strange place, all he could see was steam, and there was water up until his knee. He proceeded with care. Something is not rigth, why he was there? Maybe to figth someone? Gaara? Naruto? Kakashi? Itachi!?  
Someone is approaching! Sasuke took out a kunai, he was ready to deal with whoever it was! The sound was getting closer and closer, and it came from behind! Susuke turned with the blood-red sharigan eyes! Just to discover Sakura, in her birthday suit. "Hi Sasuke-kun! Want me to wash your back?" she asked sweetly.  
"AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH" Sasuke woke up.  
"Hey Sasuke, good morning." Kakashi greeted, and Naruto just looked at him. Sasuke tried to move, but he couldn't, he was tied to a pole, so was Naruto and Kakashi, and they were rigth in the center of Konoha!!  
"What the hell is this!?" asked a suprised Sasuke, "This is the 'pervert punishment' from the old hag Tsunade..." Naruto explained, and now Sasuke notice that there was a paper glued in his leaf headprotector, and in Kakasi's a well, and it was written: HENTAI. "This is stupid... How long we have been here?" Sasuke asked, "The whole night, and we are going to stay here the whole day as well." answered a calm Kakashi. "BUT they won't feed us!! And i'm satarving!! I want ramen!!!!!"Naruto was in the verge of tears.  
"Heh, I won't stay here" Sasuke whispered to himself, and tried to concentrate chakra in his hand to perform the chidori, but instead he felt his chakra disapearing.  
"Chakra feeding charms are placed in our arms" Kakashi explained "It's no use to try the chidori nor the rasegan.", "I see." Sasuke said disapointed.  
"Good morning perverts!" Sakura arrived "Wow what a surpise Kakashi- sensei, you arrived in time today" she giggled, and turned to Sasuke "H-hi Sasuke-kun" she couldn't stop blushing. "Aa" was the response from the confused averger, 'don't think about her! Think about revenge! Yes revenge! Kill Itachi, revenge!' Sasuke was trying hard to sustain his I-only-care- about-revenge image.  
"Sakura, I've talked to Kurenai, you're going to train with her team today alrigth?" the copy ninja said, "Ah ok, and I hope you two pervs learn your lesson today, what a rude thing to do, enter the women baths like that." She said looking at Kakashi and Naruto.  
"But Sakura-chan! I didin't enter there, It was an accident. Why just me and Kakashi-sensei? Sasuke was there too you know?" Naruto protested, "Well, that's because he covered his eyes." Said Sakura, "Huh? How do you know he covered his eyes Sakura-chan?" asked the puzzeled boy. Sakura was blushing very hard and Sasuke looked nervous, "Th-that's because he's a gentlemen Naruto, I'm sure he did that!" answered the girl, giving a sigh of relif, thank got he bougth it!  
For a moment evething was calm, until a purple jolt hugged Sasuke! "Ahhhhh Sasuke-kun!!!!!! I can't belive they did it to you, my poor Sasuke- kun!!!!!!" Ino cried while embracing him harder. "Hands off him Ino-pig!" Sakura said, and a new glare battle began between the girls. "Oh you girls are figthing over Sasuke again!?" asked Choji who was just behind Ino. "Yes Choji, we are." The blond Kunoichi said and the continued wondering "ahh that's too bad, why I wasn't bathing when Sasuke-kun broke in, he would fall in love with my beauty in no time", "That's because they pigs can't enter the Baths" Sakura smirked, "What did you say forehead-girl?" and the glare battle was on again.  
Asuma went to talk with Kakashi, and Naruto pleaded "Choji!!! Don't have some chips? Or any kind of food? Huh? Huh?", "No Naruto, sorry, but Asuma-sensei put me in a diet, he said I'll become a chuunin faster this way" said Choji, hopping to be a Chuunin like his best friend, and go to mission with him again. "Speaking of chuunins, where is Shikamaru now Asuma?" Kakashi asked, "I don't have any idea, Tsunade-sama just said it was a huge mission, and they needed his brains" said Asuma while smoking his cigarette.  
  
Meanwhile....  
In the Akatsuki hide-out, a huge shinobi battle was occuring, even Itachi and Kisame were figthing, and in the middle was... Shikamaru!?  
"Shikamaru-sama! We need a strategy, those missing-nin from the akatsuki are very strong!!" Said a random anbu.  
'Aw man!? This is realy, realy, REALY troblesome....'  
  
"I bet it is just a stupid mission" said Naruto.  
"Anyway we have to go, come on Ino, Choji" Asuma said, leaving and waving to Kakashi and Ino threw some kisses to Sasuke, which pissed Sakura.  
Another calm, and another jolt! But now it was a green one, rigth in front of Kakashi, "How could you do this to me!!!???" cried Gai "You disgrace our competetion! Now how can I say to the others that my fierce rival, Copy ninja Kakashi, is a pervert!!!!!!!!!! HOW!!!!!!!!!" sobbed Gai.  
"Huh? I'm your rival?" Kakashi was lost, and another green jolt came, rigth in front of Sakura "Sakura-chan I'm healed now!!!!!!!!!!! Look !!!!" it was Lee, wrost, it was Lee doing a tap dance to show Sakura that his legs were fine, so he could protect her again, "Ah th-that's great Lee-san, I'm very happy for you" Sakura said gently.  
Soon Neji arrived giving a smal nod to Naruto and Sasuke, and short after Tenten came as well, both of them watching their sensei sobbing like little girl.  
"Hey thick-brows, what's the problem with your sensei?" Naruto asked, Lee turned around "Wait a minute Sakura-chan" and went to help his sensei, "Cheer up Gai sensei! Even if your rival is a pervet, that makes you the winner! So even if he is stronger, you still have the the good looking fire of youth and don't need to see naked women, just like me, they claim to be on a date with us!!!", "Oh yes Lee you are rigth! I'm the winner, we have the good looking fire of youth!!!!!!" Gai huged his beloved student in a dramatic scene. Good looking fire of youth, yeah rigth....  
"So... does this happen a lot?" asked Sasuke, "Yes. Every. Single. Day...." said Neji, who still hasan't got used to such bizzare hug. 'And I thougth my team was bad' Sasuke realized.  
"I can't belive that you guys are perverts, shouldn't you have more respect for the female ninjas?" said Tenten, "I mean, we just work hard to be better than you lazy male ninjas! And what you do? Try to spy us while bathing, humph!", now Naruto was mad, who that girl think she is! "I don't know about the other girls, but you don't have to worry, because nobody wants to see a flat chested, with no butt, whit thoses weird things on the head girl like you!".  
Big mistake! Tenten was trembeling, Neji, Gai and Lee were scared, very sacared, and the others confused, suddenly Tenten opened her eye! Hell fire were burning! "What did you call me?" her voice looked like she whas possesed, Gai wasting no time commanded "I grab her arms! Lee, Neji grab her legs!" and so they did, Tenten tried to resist in vain, but she let a mensage "I'm going to get you, F shrimp! I'm going to get you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Team 7 could just watch the mad girl being dragged with their eye wide open.  
Another calm... but with no jolts this time, Kurenai and her team arrived, the teacher said "I'm sorry Sakura, I got a little late", "Ah that's nothing, I'm already used to it, thanks for taking of me today" Sakura bowed in respect.  
"Hahahahahahah you are such a loser Naruto" Kiba couldn't let this go, he was going to have some real fun today, at Naruto expenses! "Shut up Kiba! Or do you me to kick your sorry ass again?" Naruto growled. Akamaru barked, "You are rigth Akamaru, the perv boy here dosen't value the effort, with our new jutsu we could crush him in 5 minutes..." Kiba grined at the fox boy, "Don't worry Naruto-san, Kiba is lying, he can't use the sou-tou- rou (doble hedead wolf) for more than a minute" explained de bug user, Shino. "Ack! Don't tell him Shino!, that's a secret! Damn it man"  
"Ok you two stop that, we don't want our guest to think we are figth do we?", "Ah that's alrigth Kurenai-sensei, I'm used to it too" Sakura said with a small giggle, Kurenai had no idea how much Naruto and Sasuke figth in a single day.  
So the team 8 plus Sakura started to leave... but wait a minute, Hinata still was there. "Hinata, aren't you going with your team?" Naruto asked, "Ye-yeah I'm going, b-but before that, I wanted to give you this Naruto-kun." She took a handkerchief with a rice ball "I heard you complaining about being hungry yesterday Narut-kun, so I... I" Hinata said whith a shy smile, "Ah thanks Hinata!!" Naruto opened his mouth.  
Hinata's wildest dream was about to become true, she was about to feed Naruto like those romantic books said, well it not the same, but still romantic. Just when Naruto was gong to take the first bite to calm his hunger...  
"Hinata! you shouldn't feed the perverts!" Kurenai said angry, Hinata got surprised and shoved the whole rice ball in the boys throat "Gasp!! Gasp!!", "Ah, I-I-I s-sorry Naruto-kun, I'm so sorry!!!!", after calming Naruto down, Hinata left with her team, disapointed, her romantic moment was ruined... then a well know voice called her "Thanks a lot Hinata!!!!! The rice ball was great!!", as a result, the Hyuga heir spend the rest of the day in her own dream-land.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------- A few hours later ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------  
  
Everything was quiet, Sasuke was thinking how he is going to kill his brother, Naruto is dreaming about being the Hokage and kicking Jiraya's butt, and Kakashi.... well Kakashi is moving?  
In a minute or two he freed his rigth arm, the boys looked at him with hope! Yes Kakashi-sensei was going to put an end to this stupid punishment! So the silver haired Jounin reached his pocket and grabed.... the come come paradise!!  
Naruto's and Sasuke's jaws hit the floor! "What the hell!!!!!!!! Kakashi sensei aren't you going to set us free!? Take a kunai and end this torture!!!!" Naruto was going crazy!!! Kakashi just said in a calm voice "Nah... I could use a day off...."  
That did it!!!!! Sasuke could not hold anymore, he was Uchiha Sasuke, avenger of the Uchiha clan! And now, humilated because, because of that.... "DOBE!!!!!!!! This is all your fault!!!!!", "MY FAULT!?, It was you who asked to fight, don't blame me!!" "I blame who ever I want" "So you wanna piece of me Sasuke-chan!?" "Bring it on loser!!!!"  
But all they could do was kick, and they couldn't reach each other.  
  
And so ended another day, but new challenges wait for the young leaf ninjas and..."SHUT UP, MORON!!!!"  
  
THE END  
  
A/N: I want to apolagize for the grammar errors, my mother langage is not english. I've tried my best, but if there are to many mistakes, please let me know.  
  
"AHH home at last! The nightmare is over!!" Naruto sighed...... "No..... the nightmare is just begining... MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" 


End file.
